


It's Not Though ((OLD))

by LynxCore



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Crying, Depression, Drinking & Talking, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hangover, Hugs, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Other, Smoking, Underage Smoking, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-15
Updated: 2018-05-16
Packaged: 2019-05-02 08:13:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14540499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LynxCore/pseuds/LynxCore
Summary: Jeremy has big issues going on with him. Dealing with mental fighting with himself, his parents divorce, and other things he can't explain that drive him to the point of giving up.He turns to weed and alcohol.Luckly Michael and Christine are there to help.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is more of a vent fic and what not. I'll post the second chapter sometime later, don't know when however.
> 
> Sorry if this is garbage and if there are any typeos!

The crunch of styrofoam beads was the only thing that could be heard over some Troye Sivan song that Michael had put on as Jeremy shifted in his beanbag.

This was the usual for them recently. Jeremy's mom had left his family and his dad suddenly just wasn't a dad anymore. His grades dropped and he felt so confused and alone. The only surport he had was Michael and Christine.

Them and alcohol and weed. 

That was the case now. Jeremy and Michael we're sliently passing a joint back and forth from each other while Troy Sivan played in the background. Next to Jeremy's beanbag was a six pack of Smirnoff, 3 of which where missing. Jeremy had drank two full ones whilst Michael only drank half of one. 

Jeremy liked the feeling of being drunk though, it was like a comfort for him along with the weed. However today, he just felt empty and hollow. An overwhelming sadness drifted over him. 

He hated his dad for giving up on him and his mom, only he didn't, really. He still loved them very much, even if they we're not the best parents. He just couldn't understand why his mom left if she loved him so much as she's told him. She won't even come to see him, she didn't even want him.

He felt like he was going to vomit from stress and anxiety alone. He hated being like this, so confused, and anxious for seemingly nothing compared to what others delt with, like he would tell himself.

He also felt disgusting for dragging Michael into his problems. How stress and worried Michael must be. He probably doesn't even want to smoke weed and drink, he probably doesn't even want Jeremy around. 

His deep thoughts we're interupped as he felt a light tap on his shoulder. Michael was passing him the joint. He took a long deep breath before exhaleing. 

"I'm sorry, Michael. You shouldn't have to deal with this." Jeremy said before passing the joint back to Michael. Guilt laced his words as he looked down in shame.

"It's fine dude. Don't even worry about it." Michael tried to reinsure him, a small smile on his lips.

Jeremy sunk lower onto his beanbag, flipping over on his stomach and covering his face halfway with his arms. 

"It's not though." He said silently, his voice soft.

Jeremy reached over his beanbag, grabbing a bottle of Smirnoff in his hand before popping the cap off. He tilted his head back and chugged the bottle quickly, desperate for a buzz to just get so wasted he passes out instantly.

He managed to get two bottles down before Michael stopped him from drinking a 3rd.

"Dude maybe you shouldn't drink that, it's like your 5th one, you could hurt yourself." His friends voice was filled with concerned.

Jeremy stared at the last bottle of Smirnoff before setting it down. 

"You're right, I'm sorry." Jeremy curled into a tight ball on his beanbag, closing his eyes tight in a lame effort to fall asleep. 

His body felt cold and stiff. He laid sliently before he felt the sound of Michael getting up off his beanbag.

Jeremy felt a rush of anxiety as impulsive thoughts filled his head, untill he felt the light weight of a soft, warm blanket covering his body. 

He looked up just in time to see Michael sit back down again, putting out the joint and taking off his glasses.

Michael had went to get Jeremy a familiar blanket, one he recognized from all the times he had used it while at Michael's house. 

Jeremy gripped the blakent tightly around himself. Finding slight comfort in the soft white fabric.

He truly felt grateful for Michael being there for him.

The last thing Jeremy heard before he fell asleep was a ruffle of styrofoam beads and the sound of Michael telling him goodnight.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to clarify, I think I wanna make them 15 during this time and age them progressively.

Jeremy slowly opened his eyes, not quite sure what woke him up.

He looked around at the room he was in, the events of what he did and felt yesterday coming back in a flood of emotions.

He felt overwhelming regret before a sudden excruciating headache broke his thoughts. He sat up with a sudden start as he felt a sickening feeling in his stomach he knew all to well.

Quickly jumping up he ran into the bathroom in the basement. He leaned over the toilet just in time as he felt himself throw up everything in his stomach from the night before, burning his throat. 

The smell of vomit hit him as he scrunched up his nose and turned away only to turn back and continue retching what felt like his guts up.

Just when he finished vomiting he heard footsteps at the downway.

"Jeremy?" He heard a familiar voice call.

It was of course Michael. 

He looked and Jeremy and instantly knew what happened. Jeremy looked up at him and nodded, his whole body feeling like jelly. He reached up and weakly flushed the toilet, still on his knees. 

Michael quicky grabbed a couple tissues from a box of Kleenex on his bathroom sink. He leaned down and whiped off Jeremy's face. Instantly Jeremy felt a rush of embarrassement, however it quickly faded when he felt the throbbing headache return. 

"Can you stand?" Michael asked still leaning down next to him.

"I think so? I'm feeling really weak man." Jermey winced as pain swept through his body. He felt an arm being wrapped around his waist as Michael lifted him up, Jeremy almost instantly put his arm around Michael's shoulder for support.

At first he tried to stand on his own before almost falling over, he then just put he's full weigh on Michael as they walked to the beanbags.

He felt weak and crummy as Michael slowly lowered him onto his beanbag.

Michael began to bombard him with questions all laced with worry and concern. "Do you need anything? Are you alright? How are you feeling?" 

Jeremy felt overrun with emotions. He couldn't fathom how much Michael was worried. 

He felt racetracks of tears start running down his face as emotions ran through him.

Michael pulled Jeremy into a hug as he wept, making him cry harder until he was full-on sobbing into his friends shoulder.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I worry you to much I'm so sorry." He began to babble out apology after apology. 

"Hey, it's ok. It's ok." Michael whispered quite reinsurance into his ear. Before long Jeremy was trembling, clinging onto to Michael for dear life. 

Michael ran his fingers through his hair and tried to calm the pale boy down. Jeremy began to breathe normally as his tears came to a stop. He leaned onto Michael, sniffling. His headache rage uncomfortably.

"Hey, you're probably hungover right? Do you want anything to eat or do you want to wait? I could call Christine to come over and bring you something?" Michael offered, he figured the best form of action to help Jeremy was to take care of his hangover and get Christine to come over. 

Jeremy thought for a long time, did he really want Christine to see him like this? She didn't know he drank. She knew he smoked weed but not to the extent he has been. But then again he really wanted his girlfriend.

He nodded after a while.

Michael pulled out his phone as Jeremy kept his head of Michael's chest. He felt shame pool in his belly for how Michael and Christine might feel about this.

Michael called Christine, hoping she'd pick up dispite it being a Saturday night at 10am. Luckly it was Christine. She picked up almost immediately. 

He heard a cheerful sweet voice come through the reicver. "Christine's residents"

Michael felt a wave of relief. "Hey so I was wondering if it wasn't a problem if you could come over to my house? Jeremy's here and he's not doing so well." He mentally slapped himself for wording it like that.

"Wait is he ok? What's wrong? Is he hurt?" Even though the phone he could hear the amount of concern in her voice.

"Um he kinda has a hangover, a really bad one. I don't know how to really say this but he's not doing so well mentally as well, from what I can tell."

Jeremy winced as he heard the words come out of Michael's voice. He couldn't hide his true feelings anymore.

"I'll be right over as soon as I can. I'll pick him up something to help with the hangover at the store."

Michael felt a wave of relief. He really appreciated Christine. 

"Thank you so much."

"Yeah don't worry about! I'll be right there. See ya soon."

"See ya." He heard a click of the receiver as she hung up.

He set his phone down, wrapping his arms around Jeremy as he curled up on his chest, he felt like crying but couldn't. He felt anxeity and relief at the same time.

Only 15 minutes passed before Michael heard a knock off the door. He heard the voices of his moms' greeting Christine. Telling her they were downstairs. 

The door almost flung open as he heard the quick but quite steps of Christine running down the stairs.

He saw her appear at the end of the stairs with two different bags in her hands. One from a gas and one from Jeremy's favorite restaurant. 

Almost immediately she was sitting besides Jeremy's with the bags to the right of her.

Jeremy looked at the ground as a wave of shame and embarssment fell over him. Before he could drown in shame, Christine lifted his chin up to look her in the eyes. 

Almost immediately he started to tear up, Christine pulling him into a tight hug. She rocked him, despite Jeremy being so much taller than her, till he calmed down.  He was sniffling as tear streaks dried on his face. 

Christine whipped them away with her thumb. "Jeremy, what's wrong?" She looked at him with concern. He hesitated before answering. 

"I-I don't know anymore," His voice was unsteady and he could feel how pathetic he was being, "I just want to understand why I feel this way. Why can't I just focus on my work?" His voice cracked pitfully. "Why would my mom leave if she 'loved me' so much?" He managed to choke out, tears filling his eyes again. "Or say all those things to me, *about* me." He lowered his voice, as tears threatened to spill.

He shook himself. "I'm sorry, this is pathetic." He looked down as he felt tears stream down his face, leaveing tear tracks in their wake. 

Before he knew it he felt Christine's arms wrap tightly around him and Michael on the other side of him. 

"We love you ok?" Christine said after a while, rasing his chin to look at her. "I get you're confused, that's ok. No of us truly know what the fucks going on and everythings confusing but through these times me and Michael will always be there for you all we can."

She rubbed soothing cricles into his palms with one and hand and whipped the tears away with the other.

"T-Thank you." He murmured, suddenly feeling alot better, like a weighs been lifted off his chest.

Christine kisses him on his forehead. It's small and sweet and Jeremy can't help but smile. 

She then reached behind herself and pulled out the two bags.

"You guys are probably hungy right?"

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Criticism is greatly appreciated!


End file.
